Post by Trevor Williams on Mar 29, 2012 21:53:25 GMT -8
Evie = Summer
Trevor, Casey = Me
Saturday, Sept. 9, 2000
11 pm, when most of the school was asleep or hiding away in their common rooms, when the final sweep of the corridors were completed and the grand oak doors locked for the night, the time when everything was peaceful...All except the one person that still roamed the castle's upper floors. Evie walked through the dim light that came from the few and between floating candles and the dim torches on the wall, ever so slowly making her way toward the east tower, to Jared’s classroom.
It may not be the best way to go about all of this, but to her it was really the only wa, besides, it was about time she used what was passed down to her. Her great grandmother was a seer, a well known psyhic during her time, and her gift was passed to her daughter, which was in turn passed to Evie’s mum and finally passed to her. Evie never really paid much mind to it, only the fact that she rather enjoyed divination and it came easy to her and also the fact that with each generation the ‘gift’ got weaker, only really showing its self in dire times of need. Evie couldn’t even recall a time in which her mother showed any sign of having the sight, or see her using tea leaves or anything else, for all she knew this was wasted time, but at least she got to see a friendly face, not having seen Jared much since the year started.
Before she really knew what was happening Evie stopped in front of the sliver ladder/stairs leading to the divination class room, placing her hand on the railing and letting out a sigh she began her climb.
The room was no longer set in the heavy perfumes of the overwhelming incense, or the dim, pink lighting of the covered lamps, no it was more of Jared’s unique style which always made her smile a bit at his uniqueness and the somewhat sillyness of it all. Shutting the door behind her Evie took a step more into the room Hello?...Jared?
she called out, flicking her wand to light some candles to give her better light, it seemed Jared wasn’t here…Which she supposed was a good thing, less to explain about why she needed to borrow some things.
Taking another sigh she walked her way over toward the supply cabinet, weaving her way out of bean bag chairs and the small tables with lava lamps placed here and there, the far wall decorated with changing astrological signs and divination symbols, the once dull, heavy velvet cutins replaced with birhgtly colored ones..... Hopefully he wouldn’t mind, she felt like she should ask instead of just taking but there really wasn’t time for that now, and besides she didn’t feel like searching all over the castle for him. Evie took out a small, chipped tea cup and placed a few tea leaves in it for brewing later on. Shifting a few broken cups, old crystal ball stands, incense and old books until she found a small crystal ball and stand, taking it out and placing it with the rest of the ‘borrowed’ things on one of the small tables before going to fill the tea cup with some water, using her wand to heat it and let the leaves steep for a time, sitting on the ground crossed legged and trying to clear her mind of anything thought before she did drank the tea, sitting there with her eyes closed, her hands lightly resting on her knees, trying to relax...Hmm...maybe a few incense would help.
Standing up and walking back to the cabinet, she grabbed a few sandlewood scented one’s (always made her feel relaxed that smell did) and a holder, sitting back down the way she was and lighting the tip, inhaling the fragrant smoke and taking a few deep breaths, letting them out slowly, repeating the process until her mind began to wander, clearing its self of its thoughts. Evie sat like that for she didn’t know how long, but felt extremely relaxed, opening her eyes and taking a few sips from the bitter tea, sitting there just mulling over everything, not even hearing someone come in
Trevor was making his way up to the Divination classroom because he felt it would be the place least likely to run into anyone, and if he did, it would be that clueless dingbat Jared Turner. Whoever had hired him on as a teacher had to have been off his rocker, just had to have been! He was about to use his Metamorphgus skills to change his appearance back to normal as he reached the top of the ladder when he noticed there was a scent in the room that was strong. Someone was here.
He stepped up, forcing himself back into the mindset of this Headmaster Trey Hunter persona he had, recalling his master's instructions, preparing himself in case it was this Evie Winslow. He'd seen her at the last meeting, but she hadn't known it was him, seeing as he looked fairly drastically different without his changed appearance. He walked up, seeing a woman's form and figuring maybe it was Evie, but knowing there was also Serena Riley and Ginny Weasley to worry about. When he got close enough to see the ring on her finger, he knew it was her.
Excellent.
Now, how to go about this. He had to get close to her and gain a trust, perhaps catch her eye over time, couldn't just come onto her, not for a long while. This would be a slow process, placing doubt in Casey here or there, gaining her trust, proving himself dependable, proving Casey undependable. He wasn't sure he was cut out for the job. He was more an assassin, not this person who did this, but this was longer con/mission than usual, so he had to do this, couldn't kill immediately, not til suspicion would be off himself and such. He had plenty of time for a plan.
"Why, good evening, Mrs. Winslow. I wasn't expecting to find anyone here this evening...."
THe voice had brought Evie back, her mind clicking back on from its trance like state she was in from being so relaxed, setting her cup back on its saucer and looking up at who it was that had interupted her. She was a bit suprised..Well, more than a bit to see the Headmaster there, he didnt seem the type that took divination somewhat serisouly, she heard what he said replying in her mind "I wasnt expecting to be found.." but instead of sitting there sort of staring at her boss rather funny Evie decided that something needed to be said
"Good." she cleared her throat to get rid of the slight tickle from the tea "good evening to you Mr. Hunter....I was just looking for a quiet place, and this seemed as good as any"
Trevor had to work at holding back a laugh at the strange way Evie was staring at him, merely smiling passively in a friendly manner, neither here nor there until she finally spoke, nodding slightly.
"Trey, if you will, please, Mrs. Winslow. The formality is stiffling, I believe. Never have been one to be addressed like that for long." He gave her a small smile. "Indeed, this classroom usually is where I enjoy spending my evenings. No one ever seems to come looking for me here, thankfully, so I feel free to think. It seems that great minds really do think alike."
He paused for a moment, looking down at her. At least she was decent-looking. She wasn't going to be hard to pretend to be into as time progressed, unless her personality was one he hated, but as Trey he had to like her, fall for her, manage somehow to draw her away from Casey, make her his. Tall order, but he was willing to do anything for his lord, anything at all, even die. "Do you mind if I sit?"
"That they do.."s he said, moving over a bit so he would have room to sit not at all....ok, well maybe she did mind, but she would be nice "and please, call me Evie, Mrs. Winslow makes me sound so old" Evie returned a small smile as she moved her cup of tea toward her a bit when she scooted her chair over
Trevor sat down and let himself get comfortable, giving her a small, understanding nod when she said that 'Mrs. Winslow' made her sound old. "Of course, Evie," he answered, letting out a sigh. "How was your day? Hopefully most of the students behaved themselves?"
"It was..alright, nothing much to out of the ordinary, a few students deciding to try cheering charms on the unsuspecting but nothing to serious" Evie said thinking that this was a bit strange, she had never really talked to Trey in the 3 or so years, well a few words here and there but that was about it and now he was striking up conversation "yours? The daunting task of managing a school, must get a bit tiring after a while"
"Tiring?" he asked, letting out a small laugh. "At times that doesn't even begin to describe it, but it is a joy, all the same, when you see the results of the student's work and know that the teachers are doing their jobs. Today was one of the more trying days, Mrs.--Evie. Your husband, good teacher though he is, seems to have become a tad overzealous on sending students to my office on some days."
Evie rose a brow slightly "is he?" that seemed a bit strange, to her that he would just so easily send students to the headmaster without trying t o deal with it himself "perhaps I should talk to him, then, surly there must be a reason" she said, taking a small sip from her tea
"Oh, it's mainly some unruly Slytherins. I don't fault him for it. They seem to listen to me more than him, oddly enough. Guess that extra bit of authority is enough for them, though it does still seem strange. Your husband seems like the type who would be able to display enough, more than me, at times, I'd say, especially when he could simply hold them after class, but I suppose he's eager to find time to spend with you and the boy?" he answered, letting out a sigh. "How is the little one, anyway? Haven't seen him in a while. Hopefully not ill, is he?"
Evie listend to Trey, if Casey was indeed not dealing with his students jsut so he could get to her and Julian faster than she would have to talk some sense into him, he still had a job not just a family. She let out a small smile at the mention of Julian, shaking her head "No, just spending time with his grandmum, more so lately when the work load gets to be to much"
"Ah, I see," Trey answered, taking a deep breath and letting out a sigh. What on earth was he supposed to talk to her about now? Well, he could ask how things were going on the home front, but that was a bit nosy, and if his master was correct, things wouldn't be great. Voldemort had said he'd caused some doubt, and he needed to worm his way in while that was still there. He wouldn't let his lord down, but he just didn't know exactly how to deal with this. "So...your husband seemed a bit distracted when I spoke to him earlier today. He feeling alright? He shook his head and let out a sigh, waving it off. I'm sorry; it's none of my concern. You don't have to answer if you don't want."
Evie heaved a heavy sigh, twisting her tea cup around a little, it suddenly becoming very interesting, it really was none of his business, but she could at least say something and leave it at that right? "It's alright...We just had a bit of a row thats all" yea, a bit of a row, more like a war!' she said in her mind
"Oh...I'm..sorry to hear that," he answered, pretending to feel remorse for even asking. "But, you two are so dynamic from what I hear. I'm sure you will settle it in time. I suppose if it is the reason you are up here: to think about what to do about that, I should leave." The Headmaster moved to stand, giving her his most comforting smile. This could be it...prove to be someone to which she could speak and trust, and then start to worm his way in from that angle, but he had to act as though he wasn't bent on staying to comfort her or let her confide in him.
"Oh, no..you dont have to leave" Evie said looking up as Trey went to stand I mean, "we both came here for a reason...And this is your usual quiet place....I dont want to intrude upon it....."
"And I don't wish to intrude upon your thoughts, but if you are sure it is alright for me to remain here..." Trey answered, sitting back down though looking unsettled as though if she changed her mind, he was ready to stand.
Trevor hated this. He should have made his made-up character have a bit more edge, daring, but no matter. He would figure out some way...just take his time, enjoy things as much as he could when he was so eager to get to the end of this assignment that it was nearly impossible to enjoy anything.
"By all means, I could use the company anyways" Evie said with a small smile "can I offer you some....Not so delicous tea? Afarid all I could find was tea leaves" she said, looking at her cup with a bit of a face
Trevor let out a slight, polite chuckle, kicking himself inwardly, but the fool he had to be at the moment would do such a thing. "I thank you, Evie, but I think I would rather pass." He may be able to act kind to someone's face but if he had to drink or eat something he hated or that possibly tasted badly...well, he couldn't stomach that. He let silence fall for a few moments. "I suppose if we are to keep each other company, we should find something to speak on. I'm certain we could come up with something."
Evie took another long sip from the tea, seeing the gathered mush of tea leaves somewhat on the bottom, setting her cup back down and giving a slight nod as she swollowed the warm liquid "Im sure we can...After all, like you said 'great minds think alike'" she said with another smile, a bit larger than the last
He let out a brief chuckle at her words, deciding to do so because she was grinning...perhaps a sign of thinking she was witty using his words from earlier? Indeed. "So, Evie, do you actually believe this stuff that is taught here?" he decided to inquire. He himself had never placed much store in divination, but maybe she did. It would be more interesting to talk about, he supposed, instead of this small talk.
"Well" she said looking at her tea cup again "it's sort of a family gift, I guess you could say..Havent really tired it much myself but Divination always came easy to me" she answered with a shrug "I supose I do to a point" she looked over at Trey "I take it your one of the many that think its all rubbish?"
"Eh...never put much store in it to be quite honest. No one seemed to have the eye at Hogwarts. At most, I say it's a rare gift that I don't believe even this Jared fellow to have, but instead of going through a lot of batty people, I decided to transfer Jared from Astronomy to Divination. Man was thrilled, to put it mildly. To be quite honest, it was scary his reaction...there are no words," Trey answered, making a bit of a face. "But, no one's ever been able to tell me my future, any personal little detail about me or anything that there was no way they would be able to find out about through other means, so why put any store in it? Unless, Evie, you can think of some way to convince me otherwise?"
"Jared may be a bit...unconventional, but he does have a gift, it just is a bit hard to see that under all his dramatics" Evie smiled, shaking her head slightly "I wish I could, Trey, but im no psyhic. Just palm reading, tea leaves, and tarrot..Nothing that anyone else cant do"
"Well, I've not been convinced by any of those means, either...but, I'm willing to let myself be an open book to the topic...one last time. Sure you don't wish to try?" Trey answered, raising a brow.
"Alright" Evie said with a bit of a determined look. Sitting up and turning more towards Trey, resting her arms on the table, reaching out for his hand "may I?" she asked, pointing to his right hand, taking it in her left, turing his hand over so it was palm up and studying it "see this.." she said pointing to a groove on his hand that nearly reached all the way across his palm "thats your life line" Evie took her finger and traced his 'life line' letting her finger hover just above his hand as she did "it looks like you have lived quite the life..lots of movement...."
Evie turned her head to the side a little as if thinking "lived your life according to how you wanted it...But there looks like there was a time of loss, someone you loved or looked up to left for a short period of time but returned..." she said, pointing to a few smaller grooves that branched off from his life line
Trey nodded, telling her, "Of course," when she asked if she could see his hand, letting her take it, watching her study. Definitely cute like that. His job shouldn't be too hard. He just wished he was better at Legilimins so he could get in undetected like his master, but as it was, he still had a bit to work on. He wanted to figure out what it was she and Winslow were arguing over (though he had a good idea, but collecting some memories, things Winslow did that she liked, that sort of stuff, it sounded useful), but if he entered her mind, it could be obvious unless she was extremely distracted. So, he'd rather not risk it.
"Well...you got my life pretty much spot on, Evie...I indeed did lose someone...thought I did, anyway, but it turned out alright and we've been reunited...well, I wish, anyway, but...guess that's just how some things are..." he answered a bit quietly, adding the last part somewhat hesitantly, adding it spur of the moment. Maybe sounding quiet and distant and then giving some sob story could get the chick's sympathy, worm his way in from there.
Evie looked up from his hand and looked at Trey as he spoke, symphany in her eyes "Oh, I'm sorry..Didnt mean to bring up bad memories..A downside of divination, never know what your reffering to, bad memories, good memories, something the person would rather not talk about...."
"Oh, it's quite alright..." Trey answered, making a forced-looking smile of reassurance come across his face. "I understand, really. There are some things the finest diviner cannot know no matter how much one studies...."
Evie gave a small smile in return, letting go of his hand as she did "if you dont wish for me to continue, I dont want to bring up anything else unfavorable..."
"No, no, it's alright," he replied, leaving his hand where it was even though she'd let go. "If you wish, you may continue." He retracted his hand to appear as though he could go either way.
"Maybe another time" Evie said, still with a small barely noticable smile, bringing her hands back to rest at her side, the clock tower chimming in the distance, realizing for the first time that it was late. She felt guilty with leaving Julian with Casey, and she wanted to go see her son, but she also didnt want to see Casey at the moment..He just didnt understand that she was doing this for his own protection, his and Julians, even if it looked like something otherwise
Trevor withdrew his hand the rest of the way, letting out a sigh. "It's getting late...perhaps we should head back to the common room?" he suggested, though he wasn't sure whether or not Evie would be wanting to head back.
Evie heaved a sigh and gave a small nod "it's probabbly a good idea, didnt exactly leave on good terms and dont want to make things any worse with being out all night...And besides I have a little rascal that I want to go see"
Trevor nodded, standing and making sure things were neat. "If you don't mind, I should like to accompany you since I have to go back there myself....unless, of course, you would rather walk ahead of or behind me and do some thinking."
Evie stood as well, smoothing out her work robes from sitting down for so long "I would like the company" she said, it probably wasnt the best idea, but if she was left alone she would replay her and Casey's argument over and over in her mind, and Evie didnt want that, she wanted to forget it, for everything to go back to how it was..But that couldnt happen, not now, not after she ruined it for her family
"Alright," Trevor answered, walking over to the ladder, stepping aside. "After you," he said, figuring that way she wouldn't suspect him of doing something like looking up her robes if she had a dress on under there.
"Thank you" Evie said as she walked up to the ladder, carefully climbing down it, she hated ladders, always felt like she was going to fall when she went down one, but she manged and jumped down from the second to last rung, landing softly on her feet, waiting for Trey to make his way down before heading off
Trey began his way down after her, stepping down when he was sure she was out of the way, turning to face her. "So, what do you think is going to happen when you get back?" he asked, acting concerned for her well-being. "Hopefully your husband will have calmed down?"
"I'll actually be lucky if I get a nod in acknowledgment from him when I walk in" Evie said, this all seeming a bit odd to, mostly for the fact that she never just opened up to anyone like this, only her close friends, and even then it was hard to get stuff from her...but she supposed she needed to let things out, and Trey seemed willing to listen
"That's too bad...he's not the type to kiss and make up, I take it?" Trevor asked, not quite sure what all to say, but winging it wasn't that bad, usually, so he was willing to take the risk.
Evie rose a brow slightly, but waved it off, sort of looking at the ground and giving a shrug "takes a few days usualy, until we both are calmed down..Were both stubborn and dont like to admit defeat.."
"Then, this isn't the first time you've argued about whatever this is, I take it?" he asked, giving a bit of a shrug at her look.
Evie shook her head "got into it quite a bit a few years back about the same thing, but this time its a bit diffrent, more things involved"
"Oh...I see," Trevor answered, looking ahead as they walked, looking as though trying to figure out what it could be. After all, that could mean a whole lot of things that didn't involve Voldemort.
Evie only gave a small nod, not going into any more detail than that, Trey may of known they were in the Order, she wasnt so sure, not knowing what information Minerva left beihnd, but he didnt need to know that Voldemort was back , let him think what he wished with the little information she gave him
"Well, I hope you two fix it. Shame to see a good relationship go down the drain," he answered, giving her a bit of a smile that was meant to reassure her/make her smile. "Ever need any help, let me know. Might be able to talk some sort of sense into the man, never know."
Evie gave a small smile back, looking up and over at Trey "Thanks, and I will" she gave a small laugh at his comment about talking some sort of sense into Casey "good luck with that, he doesnt like anyone trying to help fix things, but you are more than welcome to try if ever needed"
"I don't think any man likes outside interferrence. Know I sure don't, but sometimes it's necessary to swallow one's pride and acccept it. Your husband's just going to have to learn that, if it comes down to it." He shrugged, rounding a corner.
'So do I' Evie said in her mind "Trey, all this..I'd rather not have anyone else know about me and Casey...Im sure it will come out in time, but, I like to think we can fix our problems before anyone else needs to know"
"As you wish," Trey answered, giving an understanding look. "Things do tend to get around too quickly at this school, and too blown out of proportion, too, somewhere along the line."
She sighed "that they do..and thanks, you've been a big help and I'm sorry to sort of dump my problems on you like that"
"It's alright," Trey answered, shaking his head. "It's what I'm here for, if anything. Can't rightly run a school if our professors are unhappy, now, can we?"
"No, cant have that" Evie answered with a small smile, this was nice, to actually talk to someone without them yelling at you or you yelling at them
"Well, here we are, then," he said, stopping before the portrait. This was nice, talking to someone for once without them running the other direction or scowling. "Might just like to do it again, if ever you need to talk to someone...."
"It was..maybe next time it will be on happier terms"
"Hopefully," Trey agreed, saying the password, stepping aside for her to go in, then going through himself, heading up to his room after saying, "Goodnight, Evie."
Evie walked through the opening, turning to Trey as he shut the painting behind him after he was in "Good night Trey..see you tomorrow" she said with a small smile before heading off toward her and Casey's room, standing out side the door for a time before taking a deep breath and walking in, hopefully he was asleep or something
Casey wasn't asleep. He'd been grading papers, trying to wait up for her, wanting to see if she had any reaction to his having cleaned the house. He was tired, especially since it was late, and after the long day with Julian, he was ready to collapse, and eventually he'd had to stop what little grading he could do to go read Julian a story, dealing with tears, with whining...it had broke his heart, made him feel angry at himself for making Evie so angry and angry at Evie for doing what started the arguments they'd been having lately.
He stared blankly at her for a few moments, trying to figure out what to say to her. He didn't want to argue with her, but what could he say that wouldn't start one? He wasn't sure saying 'hello' would get him by without an argument anymore. She'd find something in his tone or his body language when he said it to nitpick at. And at the moment, he didn't feel like saying 'hello.' She had scared him, being out so late. He wasn't sure if she'd had a Death Eater meeting and had been found out and killed, if she had decided not to come home ever again or what. 'Hello' didn't even fit anything he had running through his mind at the moment. Maybe he should just say what was on his mind, even if it detoured the reaction he had wanted to get from her by cleaning the house to be ship-shape. Right now, he didn't want her to be all happy. He was disappointed at her.
"Where were you, Evie?" he asked quietly, looking up at her. "Do you have any idea how worried you had me? Do you have any idea how upset my son was when you didn't show up to read him a story? Do you have any idea what his reaction was? Do you even care how all this is affecting him?!"
He didn't care that he had used 'my son' instead of 'our son.' It's what he felt, that lately he'd been more of a parent to the boy than Evie was. He let out a sigh, shaking his head, leaning his head against the couch, closing his eyes. He didn't want her to answer. He was tired of arguing, tired of the anger, the hurt, the fear, the loneliness. He'd given up. He had no hope of there being any way to save their marriage. He only didn't walk out on her because Julian was in the picture, and he needed both his parents. He'd never felt so alone in his life as he did right now and he hated every single second of it.
Evie looked at Casey as he spoke to her, going to comment on how nice everything looked until he started his intergation, she knew it was comming but she wanted to be the one to bring it up instead of him, (sort of strange but it made her feel justifyed in a way) "I was out taking care of a few things..I told you I would be back"
she said cooly, setting her things she borrowed from Jareds classromm on the table, she was going to ignore his tone and everything else until he said "my son"..Evie's eyes narrowed into a glare..How dare he, she was only doing this to keep them alive "dont start with me Casey, Im in no mood"
Evie knew she let Julain down, but she would make it up to him...She would. somehow, but Casey had no right, he didnt understand her reasonings, wouldnt even try to understand them
"Glad you aren't because I'm not either. I'm sick of this, Evie, all of it. I'm sick of haivng to worry, sick of having to wonder if I'll ever get to see you again because of Voldemort." He opened his eyes to look at her, glancing at the stuff she was setting on the table. "What? Are you going to divine or something? Figure out what path we're to take by the way some tea leaves happen to fall in your cup...I think we already both know where this one's leading and what needs to be done to get back on the right one without some spirit or something telling us."
He let out a sigh, rolling his eyes. "You know what, I'm going to bed." He stood, starting to walk to the bedroom. If she was going to stay up, she could have the couch tonight, see how she liked it.
"Hows it feels Casey?! Hows it feel to know what I went through, not knowing if you were alive, not knowing if you were going to come back, not knowing anything at all...!!" Evie said angerly, now he asked for it, she supoprted him when he did this, did all she could and does he? No, of course he doesnt
"I'm doing this to protect you! to keep you alive the best I can, you and Julian!" she looked to the ground, shutting her mouth, it wasnt worth it, not now, everything was so wrong
"It feels just as horrible as I imagined it, Evie, but you know what, at least when I did it, I listened to reason, I was willing to quit just for you, but are you willing to quit for me, for our son?! Of course not!" He contemplated stopping there and continuing to the bedroom, but instead he whipped around to face her, his face clearly upset, though there were traces of weariness in his eyes, posture..
"It doesn't matter to you that our son hears us argue, that our son doesn't understand why his mother would keep going off to 'play' with someone who nearly killed us...it doesn't matter to you how much I hurt, knowing what you have to go through as one of his followers and then to feel so damn powerless...doesn't matter to you that I hate arguing with you. It doesn't matter to you that you're only hurting us more in trying to protect us. We swore we'd keep Julian from him, from all this mess before we had him, and you're dragging him right into it, right into the middle of it. You knew I wouldn't take kindly to you joining Voldemort; you knew it would cause problems, arguments, just like last time, especially after I told you exactly what was expected of someone who followed him. You had to have known that was the last time you'd see me act nice on the subject!
"Damn it, Evie! I've told you before. You're not protecting us. I'm certain he didn't promise to protect you, and I know as angry as you were at me that night that he sure as hell didn't promise to protect me! Do you have any clue how easy it is for him to get the information he needs from you to convict you of not holding your end of the bargain? He could have spies in here, Evie, and we wouldn't know about it. Some servant could so much as claim they heard it and he'd strike. He wouldn't wait to find out if it were true or not.
"How do you think it feels to be lied to, huh? That's what I feel...betrayed. That damn letter you promised me that you would go into hiding with Julian after that first meeting, but did you? No! You leave me in a predicament where I have to worry about you and about Julian all the time. By joining him, you put us all directly back on the map and at the forefront of his mind!"
"I cant just quit Casey, not now, not after all he has planned for Harry, Ginny...You!"
Evie stopped midsentance, taking out her wand..not caring if Casey thought it was for him or not, she waved it at Julians room, putting a silencing spell on it, no need to wake him if they havent already
"How dare you say that it doesnt matter to me, of course it does! Dont you think it's killing me as well? Do you think that I enjoy this?! Fighting with you, not even sleeping in the same bed as you?! But I just cant stop going, Julian is as good as dead if I do."
Evie paused for a few minutes, placing her wand back into her pocket
"What else was I supposed to do Casey? Looking that man in the eye that night in the forest, being caught completly off guard, he was supposed to be dead! and I was staring death right in the eye. I was scared, I had a husband and a son to get home to...I joined him to save my life...I was selfish, but now its to late to do anything about it!"
When she took out her wand, Casey's hand went to his pocket to grab his. If she was going to send something at him, he at least wanted a chance to defend himself. He let his grip loosen when he realized it was to put a spell so his son couldn't hear them, but he didn't remove his hand from his pocket until she put hers away.
"No choice?! What the hell is running through your head, Evie? Whatever it is sure isn't logic...going into hiding is an option, even faking your death would. Sure, your parents would blame me, but I could handle them. But I sure can't handle this. If I have to keep this up, one of these days I will blow, and it will be even uglier than it already is.
"We're in the Order, Evie. They could hide you, send Julian with you, or we can fake your death, and you can still teach, only with a polyjuice potion. Though, with the second you wouldn't be able to visit Julian in case there are spies. Please, Evie, for us, just go into hiding. Either way, you could possibly still teach with aide of a polyjuice potion, if you want to stay around to be near me. We could hide you somewhere in the school, where he wouldn't expect."
"Casey, I was in hiding the last time, and looked what happened, you nearly died, you did die! And I had to sit and watch it all...I wont do that again, not when I can fight, I'm sick of being useless and if I cant do anything else any other way then I will do them my way. I want to be with you, not prading around as someone else..I want to be with my son, Julian wouldnt understand if someone else was around him all the time, around you all the time..."
She wasnt being reasonable, she knew she wasnt but Evie didnt care, not at the moment, she wouldnt watch her husband die again, she couldnt go through all that again...wouldnt
Casey lifted his hands somewhat at his side, tensing and untensing his fingers. If he had ever been close to laying a hand on her, it was then, but he managed to keep them near his side.
"You think you're not useful going into hiding? You're certainly not useful like this. If you were to go into hiding, you'd be able to help my focus, keep me from having to worry about you and Julian. If you absolutely had to fight, you could use a polyjuice potion, act as a new member. You could even take up logistics and setting things up, something we need someone to do, while you're waiting for a battle. I just don't want to have to keep worrying about you every single evening! I'm sick of worrying and of our arguing. I feel like I never can relax. I feel so alone even though I have someone else living with me. I hate this; I hate life. It hurts to live; it always hurts to live...I never get to sleep, for when I do, I only wake up after a few minutes. Nightmares, Evie, but if you just went into hiding, maybe they'd stop being so bad, so frequent. They had started to go away before all this.
"You could fight, if you have to, all of us are his target out there. Damn it, I don't care if you fight, but the rest of the time, hide, please. I want you; I need you; I need to know there's someone who still cares besides my son. I love you, Evie, but I am so sick and tired of this. I can't do this anymore. No more." He shook his head, turning, stopping at the doorway, leaning there for support but not facing her. His voice was getting hoarse, breaking, and tears were threatening to fall. He felt broken, and he hated it.
Evie saw his hands raise, bringing her own up a little to defend herself if needed, if it ever came down to that she would be gone, take Julian and leave without so much of a second thought..But Casey put his hands down and she listened..Feeling so near tears at his words..he hated living, wanted it to end, didn't want to continue..Wanted someone to care..She did care, she loved him, would never stop.
Maybe she should, just go into hiding so he didn't have to deal with all of this, continue teaching to keep herself sane, even if she had to do it as someone else she would still be able to know what was going on. Evie looked up from the ground where her eyes fell as she listened to Casey, looking at his back as he leaned sort of in the doorway, hearing his voice, reading his body launage..She almost had him in tears.
Evie felt so horrible, nearly reducing her husband, her prideful, "I dont cry for anything" husband to tears. She felt like she was taking a dagger and sticking it in him, kept re opening an old wound.
She took a step forward, wanting to go comfort him, tell him that it was all OK, ease his fear but at the same time she didn't know what to do so she stopped after 2 or so steps
"Casey..I..." Evie started, not knowing what to say, what to do, and she didn't like it
"Yeah...what?" Casey asked, just staying there. Heavy, that's how his chest felt: extremely heavy, restricting, and his face was numb, head numb. He couldn't breathe, couldn't feel, couldn't think. He was getting dizzy, like if he let himself, he'd just fall over fainted. He'd fight it. It was probably just from holding in the tears. He gripped the doorframe harder with the hand on the arm he had up against it, head resting against but hanging forward, other one just staying at his side as his body weight was supported by the door frame.
"What is there to say that you haven't already said? I've heard all I can take. I've had enough. I'm through with this. You've told me how you feel, how much you think of what I ask of you, that you don't trust me enough to trust my instinct or to go with what I want. You've proved you'll believe an evil man over me, even if with some talking I can convince you otherwise. I can't take anymore, Evie. I want to hope, but I don't even dare do that anymore. The way we're going, maybe it's better I leave so that we stand some chance of actually talking without getting into an argument everytime we see each other.
"It broke my heart, seeing Julian like I did today when you left, almost crying. He doesn't understand all this, but it scares him. I never told you, but one time I found him under his bed. This is hurting him. I can't do it anymore. I don't want our son to remember us fighting before suddenly one of us disappearing and never seeing us together anymore, just separate. I don't want us to end, Evie.
"But, unless we perhaps take a break from each other for a few days, then, I don't know...I want you, Evie, and I need you, but if I can't have you without every little thing being an argument....I don't know what to do. We need some help, and not from Serena, from someone outside the family who doesn't know us personally or something...someone who's not going to think us crazy for or get scared of us mentioning Voldemort's name."
Evie closed her eyes as he spoke, fighting back her tears. She felt horrid, absolutely horrid, she let her son and her husband down. They had to fix this, somehow. She opened her eyes as he continued and looked at Casey.... he looked sick, she hadn't really noticed till then and it only made her feel even more horrid. This is what she was doing to her family, reducing her husband to tears, making her son so afraid that he hides, breaking promises to Jules, arguing with Casey, not being there for them when she should, she wanted to cry but she wouldn't allow herself to, there wasn't any room for tears anymore, not after what she has seen. She was well past tears and moved on to the emptiness this all brought
Evie stood there a few minutes before realizing that she hadn't said anything yet, she was to lost in her own thoughts about Julian, Voldemort, Casey, them....
"Casey, I love you, you know I do and I........" she paused, looking down "I want to be with you, taking a break will only cause more problems, no one else can help us because no one else knows what we've been through, we have to do this together..."
Evie took another step toward Casey, maybe she should take him to the hospital wing or to the bed room, let him lie down before he collapsed which it looked like might happen
Evie's silence worried Casey. Was she going to just let it go down the drain? Was she just going to let him stand from this doorway and leave? He didn't want to, but if she didn't want him here...if she thought his idea best of taking a few days break, he would, but he didn't know whether it would work or not. He was kidding himself if he believed that a few days break would make it so he would waltz back in this room to a happy family where he'd be welcomed by his wife with open arms. Only part of that picture that would be true would be his son. He knew Julian missed him when he was gone.
They had been through too much. He had quit quidditch before this, when Julian was one and a half, come back to teaching. They'd argued then (before he quit) but nothing like this, never like this, never where they were in seperate beds at the end of the night. Maybe it was because he'd been willing to give in and quit, even if playing Quidditch on the Ireland team was his dream job. He had enjoyed it, enjoyed being seeker, and he missed it still at times, but he never imagined doing any differently. He wouldn't have traded those moments with his son and wife for anything.
Maybe that was their difference...she was more stubborn, far less likely to submit, even when he expected it at times. Maybe they just weren't cut out for each other, maybe this was really it. Maybe there wouldn't be anymore them, just two people, male and female, husband and wife, living in the same house, sleeping in different rooms, living different lives, neither asking what the other was doing or who they were with or what they were doing with the person. It made him feel sick to think of it, but he didn't know what else there was. He didn't know how to make this work, and he hated it more than anything. He hated when he didn't know, hated when he couldn't fix things.
He felt like he was failing in some way, every time he yelled at her, but she was being so stubborn! She wouldn't listen. It was like everything was either going through one ear and out the other or she was a rubber wall, sound of his voice bouncing off and away from her before she heard it.
He heard her voice, speaking, finally. His shoulders tightened, every muscle in his body contracted, waiting for it, waiting to hear the inevitable, that they were through, but it never came, and the dizziness only got worse with the relief he felt at that fact, but that didn't mean his guard was down yet.
"How are we supposed to do it, Evie? Every single time we talk, we end up yelling at each other...it sickens me, makes me not even want to try..."
"We have to try Casey, we've been through so much together we cant let it end like this. I still love you, I would be dense not to" she took a few more steps toward him, sort of standing off to his side "I'l- I'll go into hiding, fake my death...But it just cant happen right away, we have to plan this, talk with the order..Talk with Julian, let him know..."
This wasnt what she wanted, in her mind she thought this was sitting and doing nothing, but, Casey..She's never seen him look like he did, he looked like death and she had to oblidge him somehow, even if she didnt want this she would do it she just didnt know how
"What more planning does it need? I would be surprised if Voldemort doesn't already know you and I are arguing. I can face your parent's anger, and--never mind, Julian doesn't need me in Azkaban. He let out a sigh." Bad idea. He gripped tighter onto the door frame. "Let's get the Order over here, put a silencing spell around the rest of the room so no spies can hear. I'll go walk and get John, you can get Serena, Ginny, Jamie, probably get Jared, too. Man showed interest before....it's not like there are classes tomorrow. We need to tell them about all that's been going on, Voldemort being back..."
Evie shot her hands out to Casey as he sort of wobbled where he was standing, one hand resting on his shoulder and the other at his back. He couldnt go down to the grounds alone, what if the Death Eaters were waiting for him? Waiting for him to be alone so they could kill him..Casey wouldnt be able to put up much of a fight like this "No Casey" Evie said shaking her head "it can wait, your in no condition...You cant even stand without supporting yourself...We can do it first thing tomorrow" Evie was sure to add, so he didnt think she was trying to get out of telling everyone else "you need rest.."
"I-I'll eat; we can do this tonight. I'm just hungry, is all. Hardly ate any dinner last night, barely ate today...I can fly if you don't trust me to walk." Casey knew that that wasn't it, that it wasn't hunger, but he wasn't about to admit he was getting sick, not after rarely to not being ill for the greater majority of their marriage. It was the stress, piling on him, weakening his immune system, and some of the students had come to class ill recently, probably just a cold picked up from them. A cold, he could handle. The restricted breathing, probably needed to blow his nose, right? Dizziness from the restricted breathing, inability to stand from the dizziness. Just a couple days and he'd be over it, right? Hopefully Julian didn't get one now. He didn't need a cold. "The sooner we get this planned, the better. The less you have to see of that coward, the better..."
He shrugged her hand off his shoulder and let go of the doorway, turning to look at the couch. He could make it, just a few steps...
"Casey, a few hours wont make a difrence...Please, I need you to take care of yourself" she said, bringing her hand away from his shoulder when he shrugged it away, bringing the other down as well from his back..If he didnt want her to touch him she wouldnt
"And to do that, I need to know you'll be safe," he answered, taking a wobbly step towards, the couch, grabbing onto a random piece of furniture, using it to keep himself steady until he finally reached the couch, sitting down on it. "If there's any chance of you getting killed, I don't care what state I'm in. Even if I'm near dead, kept alive by spells, I'd make sure I was there to help you somehow."
"Casey please..." Evie said quietly, watching him walk to the couch, reaching out to help him but she stopped..he diddnt want her help. She sat down next to him, shaking her head "I wont leave..i'll stay here with you until we talk to the order...but you have to let your self rest..."
"I will let myself rest, just let me do this, get the Order, stay here and keep an eye on Julian while you get them. I don't care. I just want this to be over with," he said, blue eyes moving to look at his wife, hand reaching out and taking hers, eyes looking down. "I can't rest without knowing you'll be fine, Eves. Living without you is far worse than this."
Evie was a bit suprised that Casey took her hand but gald all the same, she squeezed his hand lightly, using her other to lift his chin somewhat so he could look at her "Casey, you'll always have me" Evie said softly, moving her hand from under his chin to rest on the side of his face, stroking her thumb along his cheek "I'll be fine Casey, just rest. I'm not going anywhere even if he calls I wont leave your side"
"And if you don't go, you risk our son's life," Eves, Casey answered, letting her stroke his cheek, her touch welcome after so long not having it. He let his neck sort of relax, head leaning against the couch as he looked towards her, letting his eyes rest for a few seconds before opening them again. Keeping them open was beginning to hurt, but it could be from the hour. He still wasn't willing to admit to being sick.
"Honey please, at least rest your eyes...I've put you through enough already" she said, resting back against the couch with him, leaning on her side so she could face him "he wont call again tonight, he doesnt even want me there to begin with, he's only using me to get to you"
"He's doing a damn good job of it," he answered, letting out a sigh, keeping his eyes on her for a few seconds before giving into the feeling of his heavy lids, closing them, wanting to just give into sleep but not wanting to at the same. "We should go get ready for bed, I guess..." he said, sitting up and letting out a sigh, standing, having to stay still for a few seconds before daring to move. How he loathed that feeling of sudden dizziness.
Evie stood when he did, looking at Casey with concern when he didn't move right away. She walked with him toward the bedroom, walking slowly, keeping step with Casey in case he collapsed or something. As they reached the door way to their room Evie paused, looking in the direction of Julian's "I'll be there in a minute..."
She said to Casey quietly, walking to the door of her sons bed room and opening it a few inches -making sure the other lights were out so it did shine in Julian's eyes- Evie brought her hands up, each one resting on the opposite upper arm as she leaned against the door way, watching Julian sleep. So innocent, peaceful, nieave to the world and all that was wrong in it....
Her green eyes scanned the room, a few things out of place from his little adventure with his broom, Evie followed the trail of blocks that he neglected to pick up; grinning a little, her eyes coming back to Julian, still clutching the book she was supposed to read him..Evie's grin quickly faded, she had let him down, broke a promise to her son, something she vowed never to do the day he was born, but she did..vowed to protect him but she was just bringing him right into all of this
"I'm so sorry Jules.."
Evie said quietly, resting her head on the molding along with her left side, closing her eyes to hold back the tears. She wanted to go tell him that herself, right now, but it was to late at night to wake him..maybe she could bring him into their room, but if Casey was getting sick she didn't want him sick to. She opened her eyes again, looking at her son, just staying like that, watching him sleep
Casey took a bit getting ready, having to be careful of how fast he moved and how suddenly he stopped, and then having a big debate with himself over whether to wear a shirt or not. On the one hand, right now it felt too cold to not wear one, but if he got warm during the night, then he'd want the thing off and have to wake as a result, so he decided to put on a tank top, figuring it less likely to get him hot but still keep him semi-warm for the moment. Finally ready about twenty minutes later, Casey came out to the main part of the room, speaking before his eyes really focused on anything, "Sorry, Evie, it's just--"
Well, no use talking to himself. She wasn't there. 'Probably sleeping on the couch,' he mused, letting out a sigh. Maybe he should tell her that she didn't have to sleep on the couch, that she could have it, and he'd sleep on the couch if she wanted. So, he walked out of the bedroom, going to the sitting room, eyes taking a bit to focus in the darkness and with the added dizziness...He finally found her in Julian's doorway, walking up behind her as quietly as he could manage, resting a hand on each of her shoulders as he stepped close, resting his face against the back of her head for a moment before deciding to dare to give her a quick kiss on her neck, resting his head on her shoulder and against the side of hers, bringing his arms all the way around her shoulders.
"He'll bounce back, you know," he whispered quietly so as not to wake Julian.
Evie heard Casey walk out of the room, not really paying much attention to the fact until he came up behind her, put his arms around her, kissed her neck, rested his head on her shoulder..She gave a small smile, bringing one of her hands up to meet his arm, closing her eyes, just enjoyig this feeling of having such a long absence from it
"I know he will..But he wont forget....." she said quietly, looking at Julian again, how could that kid sleep with a corner of a book sticking him in the side?
"You'll make it up to him," Casey responded quietly, moving his eyes from the sleeping form of his son to look at Evie's face as best he could from the corner of his eyes, finally having to give up and close them. "He loves you, just can't understand all this at three...but we have to keep this all together, keep fighting, for him, for us...If we don't, Voldemort wins before things even start, but more importantly, I love you, doodle bug."
He knew she hated pet names, but he was meaning it in a playful manner, wanting to see that smile he had gone for what seemed like forever without seeing. He only hoped she'd realize that and not get moody and cold towards him for it.
'Yuck, doodle bug' Evie thought, closing her eyes and shaking her head a little, not so much so she wouldnt hit Casey's and let out a small chuckle and with a cross between a smirk and a smile "I love you to honey bunny"
she said, still keeping her voice quiet. Casey was right, they had to keep this all together for everyones sake
Casey smiled slightly, letting out a sigh and stood up straighter, moving his hands back to her shoulders. "Come on, let's get to bed before we wake him."
"One second" Evie said quietly, walking the rest of the way into Julians room and over to his bed, bending down and carefully taking the book from her sons grasp, moving to give him a kiss on his forehead once she had the book..She would make it up to him somehow..
She stood up right and walked to Julians book shelf, placing the book in its spot before walking back over to Casey with a small yawn
"You think he's ok?" she asked, turning and looking at Julian again
Casey watched her, leaning against the doorframe as he waited, noticing her yawn, hearing her question and nodding. "He's fine, Eves. You'll make it up to him." He reached out to place an arm around her shoulders, hoping to Merlin he wouldn't loose his balance and pull her down with him.
Evie put her arm around him as he did to her, feeling him wobble a little, watching Casey try to make seem so nothing was wrong. She tightned her grip on him a little more to give him some supprt as she slowly began to walk toward their room "Come on, lets get you to bed"
Casey let out a sigh, nodding, letting her lead him and support him (though still supporting himself as much as possible). Finally reaching the bed, he pulled back the covers on his side, getting in it and pulling the covers over himself. Definitely more comfortable than the couch, though the coldness of the fitted sheet against his feet and arms sent shivers through him until the sheets warmed to body temperature. It took him a bit to get comfortable, but he finally managed it.
Evie walked to her side, pulling the blanket back enough so she could get in and stacking her pillows till they were at a comfortable height. She sat on the bed and began taking off her earings and necklace, looking down at her clothers only to nottice that she still hadnt changed yet. letting out a sigh she stood back up and grabbed her pajamas off the back of the chair in the room, quickly changing and getting back into bed and pulling the covers up around her, turning on her side to look at Casey..still worried about him and wondering if she should take him down to the Hospital wing
Casey turned to his side, facing her after a few moments deciding he wasn't comfortable anymore, squinting his eyes shut as he did to avoid dizziness the best he could, opening them and letting them settle on her for a while before closing them again. He didn't know what to do with himself. If he was getting sick, that wasn't good, but he couldn't exaclty think of any way to get rid of it now that it was already having an affect on him.
"Casey, are you sure your alright?" Evie asked with concern as she watched him squint and close his eyes a few times...Maybe she really should take him down to the nurse, he rarely ever got sick, and when he did it was bad and dizziness wasnt something normaly caused by a cold....
"Perfectly fine," Casey answered, not bothering to open his eyes, giving her a bit of a smile before taking off the covers. Blah, bloody sickness.
Evie watched as his eyes squinted even though they were shut, his meager attempt at a smile and she sighed. He wasnt going to let her take him willingily, not after tonight. No, Casey would want to be here and not stuck in the hospital wing for a few hours. Slowly Evie brought her hand up: turning it to its back and gently touching it to Casey's forehead to check for a feaver; he was a little warm but nothing to serious
"Everything to your liking?" Casey asked when she pulled her hand away. He always felt like a little baby when she did that. Did she not trust him to let her know if something serious was going on? Surely she'd trust him to tell her before the illness got to the point that it could kill him.
"For now" Evie answered, bringing her hand back to rest at her side "but I would feel better if you went down to see the nurse tomrrow..."
Casey rose a brow, opening his eyes to look at her. "I can guarantee you that Poppy is still the sprightly, no nonsense nurse with graying hair and the beginning traces of wrinkles as usual..." How he hated the hospital wing. He'd seen that place one too many times for his liking.
"Casey, I'm serious...you have to take care of yourself first before anything. Julian needs his daddy and I need you "
"I'll be fine, Eves. Just need rest for a few days," Casey assured her, yawning. "Probably just stress catching up with me..." He snuggled into his pillow a bit, curling up to try to get warmer.
A few days rest with Casey was near impossible. He never let himself rest, was always up and working on something even when he did manage to get sick. She rolled her eyes slightly, noticing that he was cold so she pushed her half of the blanket toward him "here" Evie offered, placing them around him more before he had a chance to protest "now, get some sleep she instructed"
"You need some, too, Eves," Casey said, not seeing how she couldn't be cold. Wasn't it in the least bit chilly? "I'll just have a house elf bring an extra and lay it over me..."
"I can manage" Evie responded by pulling the cover sheet more around her...it provided enough warmth for her for the time being "just get some sleep Casey"
'Easier said than done,' he thought to himself as he let out a sigh, pulling the covers tighter around him. "Night."
"Good night" she said, leaning over and giving him a small kiss to his cheek in goodnight. Evie laid back on her pillow looking up at the ceiling for a few minutes before turning to her side and closeing her eyes, bringing her arm under her pillow as she did. At least they were sleeping in the same bed again....that had to be a good sign right? But for how long? It wasnt long after this thought that she fell into sleep being to drained to continue on for the night